Thursday, February 15, 2007

I know that shoe is around here somewhere

I've been reluctant to post as of late. We've had eleven days episode-free, and a post just seems like asking for it. Things have been going swimmingly! And also, slightly less than swimmingly.

Eleven days, no episode. Excellent. But at this point? We're kind of starting to make bets on when it is going to happen. We've made it through a planned-in-advance dinner and through the Valentine's festivities without being interrupted by an event. Josh is full of theories of why they happen, and hypothesizing about how to prevent them without medication. I'm just hoping it happens on a low key day. I'm also wondering if they will cluster this go-round, like the previous two go-rounds. We've had a brilliant eleven days. KayTar has been the giggliest, silliest version of herself and we love it. We've been able to have a life! Make plans! Have fun with the kids! Go to dinner! Sleep at night!! Glorious!! But its been long enough that we're waiting for that other shoe to drop at this point. It isn't an "If..." in our minds, but rather a "When..." Is that negative? Maybe. But it is realistic.

KayTar has also decided eating is for suckas. Yesterday, we forced ENCOURAGED her to eat 1/2 of a yogurt and 1/2 of a stage 2 baby food. That's it. ALL. DAY. LONG. With her milk bottles, her grand total of calories was 500. The entire week has been the same give or take a hundred calories or so. *sigh*

And she's taken to getting very upset in the car the past few days. And shrieking. A LOT. And it makes me feel like there is a small furry animal inside my chest clawing its way out. Only it CAN'T get out. So instead it climbs up my throat and starts clawing its way through my brain. And I just want to beat my head on the steering wheel to make the furry little creature pass out. Today was the worst day. It was non-stop on the way to and from BubTar's school. And she was pulling her own hair with both fists while she shrieked. I tried playing games with her. Even SHOUTING games, in which we yell fun words like "Choo!!!" or "Go!!!!" but she wasn't taking the bait. She was going to shriek and pull her own hair whether I liked it or not. I did NOT like it. I canceled therapy and put her in her crib for quiet time. I called my mom to pick up BubTar, because there was no way we were getting the car a second time today. She had quiet time and then a nice long nap and woke up in a delightful mood. But tomorrow (cue ominous music) we'll have to get in the car again.

On another note, we had a glorious Valentine's Day. BubTar said it was "The best Balentimes Day EVER!!" and I credit at least half of that to Beck. Thanks again, Beck! We are keeping the decorations up for the rest of the week, because there was much weeping and gnashing of teeth when we discussed taking them down.

I'll be sure to let you know when that other shoe drops. I know its up there somewhere, and we all know what goes up, must come down.


NotSoSage said...

Kyla, the waiting must be the worst! I'm inclined to say that maybe KayTar's just channelling her almost two year-old self, but I don't want to downplay how frustrated you're feeling. 500 calories is not much for her little self.

I wish you luck, patience and more restful nights.

Beck said...

I hope that shoe doesn't drop. The Baby screams her frickin' head off in the car these days, too, so it be just the special magic of being two. I hope she starts eating more tomorrow - have you tried mashed avacodos? Those little green things are calorie powerhouses and I can always trick the baby into eating them. And if need be, you can puree them and stick them into yogurt. Gross.
I always leave my holiday decor up until the following weekend. Which means my house is frequently unbelieveably tacky. That's okay with me! I'm so glad you guys had fun.

Kyla said...

I think you guys are probably right. A part of this is KayTar's interpretation of the 2's. But I hate that even when the answers could be simple, we have to question it. We can't just accept she has a "rough day", we think "Uh-oh, maybe she's having an off day because an episode is coming." We're always second guessing things.

ewe are here said...

Oh god. The shreiking. I feel your pain - it's making my ears ring at this end.

Where oh where do they learn to do that???

Hang in there... sending you 'patient' thoughts.

WarriorMom said...

If/when that shoe falls, I hope it falls softly.

And I hope Kaytar gives up her shrieking & fasting soon, too. I drive myself nuts trying to figure out why my son does things like that.