On Friday, I attended the staff Christmas party of the school I "work" at. Basically I come in one night every week or two and take care of some registrar related work....mostly I work from home, though. I saw a parent I haven't seen in a while, who works in radiology. I asked him if he worked with our Children's Hospital and we just started talking. He asked me for everything we knew about KayTar so far, which I explained in full, without crying. (Yay me!) To be totally honest, I did kind of start to tear up. When I verbally list it all like that, it feels so overwhelming, like me speaking it aloud makes it more real. He said since he "walks among the doctors" he can get a feel what the different doctors are like. He said he's going to read up on her conditions and talk to with different neurologists as he gets a chance too, and let me know what he finds out. He said he feels like KayTar is his own and he'll do everything he can to help us out. Then he said, "You know, we pray for her every day when we get in the car to come home from school." And THEN I cried.
People say "We're praying for you." all the time. Our pastor says it is the all-purpose Christian hello and goodbye. "Hey! We're praying for you!" or "Well, we'll see you next Sunday...we're praying for you." but rarely does it mean anything. Its just something people say. For that reason, I rarely say it. But when he said "We pray for her every day when we get in the car to come home from school." I knew he was telling the truth. It was so shocking that someone who I never even see anymore prays for my KayTar every day. Thankfully, it was the end of our conversation, so I was able to walk away, have a sip of water and choke down my tears before seeing anyone else. It was just so kind I almost couldn't bear it. Even now, writing about it, my eyes still fill with tears. I think praying for someone is the purest kind of love, and to think someone loves my KayTar in that way without even really knowing her is just amazingly overwhelming.