Friday, September 14, 2007

Pausing for Beauty

Let's rewind a bit, shall we? Sunday I had several hours to myself, reading, enjoying coffee, getting a haircut. Monday night, I went out for coffee with friends, no children. And then Tuesday, I received the most beautiful gift. The beauty of the gift was only outdone by the beauty of the heart that gave it.


These arrived on my doorstep Tuesday afternoon when everything matched their beauty. KayTar was healthy, I had been able to take a bit of a breather, life was realigning itself to some semblance of normal, and the flowers were the beautiful icing on the cake. I thought my heart would burst.

And then, as it always seems to happen, KayTar started to get sick and the dark cloud crept in once more. I felt overwhelmed immediately. The good; the beauty that I had found in those few days vanished as quickly as it had come. But the flowers were blooming, bigger and brighter each day in spite of it all.


Each time I enter the kitchen, where they sit perched near the window, I pause to look at them. At times, I pull them down off the counter just to feel the weight of them in my hands, the weight of someone's thoughtfulness right there in my kitchen. The kitchen is the first place I go each morning and usually the last place I visit each night. Each day, the flowers whisper good morning and goodnight. When KayTar wakes in the night, I stumble in, half-blind to get her a drink. The flowers wink at me, through my squinted, tired eyes; reminding me that beauty exists even here, in the wee hours of the morning...even when everything else sleeps soundly.







The rustle of the leaves, the velvet of the petals, the vibrancy of the colors work together to speak out to me in a voice I recognize, saying, "The beauty is always there, you just have to remember how to look for it."

And I whisper back to them, "Thank you. Thank you."

26 comments:

jen said...

damn you - you actually made me cry.

the beauty is in you. we can't help but notice your grace and want to share in it in some small way.

mamatulip said...

Amazing. Simply amazing. The flowers, the friendship, the connections that have been made.

I haven't been around for the last week or so; I'm sorry to hear that things have been a bit...rough for you all.

Ben & Bennie said...

WOW!!! They're gorgeous!

Janet said...

Her heart reaches across the continent, the world even.

What a beautiful post, Kyla.

Julie Pippert said...

Awwwwww...that is ALL so gorgeous, the flowers, her, you, this post...all.

Julie
Using My Words

bubandpie said...

I really relate to this post, because I'm a bit taken aback by how totally obsessed I am with the Pie's new hat. But that's what it is: "the weight of someone's thoughtfulness." And that weight is so much more striking, somehow, when it takes physical form out of this ether of the blogosphere.

Mommy off the Record said...

What a beautiful post.

thailandchani said...

That's wonderful! :)


Peace,

~chani
http://thailandgal.blogspot.com

metro mama said...

So lovely.

Kristin said...

You gave me goosebumps with that, Kyla.

Lisa b said...

Thanks for making me smile.

Beck said...

Oh, that's lovely.

Chaotic Joy said...

"the weight of someone's thoughtfulness right there in my kitchen."

Oh Yay!! When I read your post yesterday, I remember wishing I knew you. I mean knew you in person, so I could do something for you. I am so glad that someone did. So Yay for her. Yay for you. Just...Yay!

Christine said...

jen is amazing.

and so are you, lady

love,
c--

Aliki2006 said...

They are lovely! I'm so happy you have those flowers to lift you up.

motherbumper said...

Just perfectly beautiful.

flutter said...

Oh you two. Making me cry so early in the day...

Katie said...

"the weight of someone's thoughtfulness right there in my kitchen"

nice line...beautiful!

PJ said...

What can I say? My hat's off to you, your husband and precious Kaytar to face life's difficulties with courage and grace. The little "cue me" brought a tear to my eye. What a heart your little one has!

God's grace and blessings on you and yours!

PJD

Junie's Blog said...

Beautiful.

jo(e) said...

Such a beautiful post.

crazymumma said...

Thats nice.

And tingly. I think there is a good reason Jen sent you flowers.

carrie said...

That was beautiful.

kittenpie said...

Oh, how wonderful. Tulips are my favourite, and those are extra lovely.

NotSoSage said...

That jen is a good, good egg.

NotSoSage said...

As are you.