Thursday, April 26, 2007

Just like a miracle.

It feels like we've had at least a month of KayTar related drama, maybe even two. Nothing major, just enough to make me feel like I've had to be "on" all the time. This week has been amazing in comparison. Her fluid intake is astronomical. She is consistently meeting or exceeding her daily calories WITHOUT Pediasure. She is sleeping through the night without night vomiting. Okay, she is staying up until after 11pm, but she IS sleeping, and she isn't vomiting! I haven't had to bother the pediatrician for anything this week. She hasn't had an episode in 22 days. It is such a relief.

I know from history that life won't stay this way. She'll have an episode. She'll stop eating. She'll start vomiting. She'll refuse fluids. She'll stop peeing. All the progress we've made with her eating will be erased in the course of a week. And then we will start it all over again. It isn't pessimism. It is life. But the break we've had? Priceless. I can't remember the last time she was exceeding her calories or not drinking Pediasure every day. It is amazing. The longer we are able to do this, the better. When the episode finally does hit, she's going to have some nice reserves built up. So even though we fully realize we spend our days chasing our tails with her eating/drinking, it makes it worth it when we can get an edge on what is coming. It feels good.

I do find it a litte humorous that the things she struggles most with on a daily basis are the things most people don't think about. Sleeping, eating, drinking, pooping, peeing. We are talking basic. These are the things babies are born doing. She's two and it is an uphill battle every day. I always took these basic functions for granted, because they are inborn and necessary for life. You'd think hunger=eating, but what if you don't feel hunger? You'd think thirst=drinking, but what if the thought of drinking made you gag? You'd think that tired=sleep, but what if the feeling of your sinuses draining the tiniest bit induced gagging and vomiting? I can't blame her, if I felt things the way she does, I'm sure I'd be just as reluctant to meet those needs. And so we work our hardest to keep her at a healthy level without pushing her past where she can be comfortable. And weeks like this, everything just lines up. It is perfect. So perfect. The whole week has been one gigantic sigh of relief. We don't have weeks like this very often, but when we do it feels like a miracle.

13 comments:

nomotherearth said...

Really glad to see that you got a bit of a break. It makes all the difference in the world - like a vacation can!

Christine said...

I am so happy that you have a good week. Here's to many, many more. . .

Kristin said...

Perfect. Keep on enjoying it. Hope she is too.

cinnamon gurl said...

Wow... glad you've gotten a break and enjoying it to its fullest.

Your insight in this post into her challenges is astonishing and beautiful.

~aj~ said...

I'm so glad to hear about your wonderful week. Me thinks you all deserve a special treat this weekend to celebrate!

Julie Pippert said...

The way you write this---eloquent, open, honest---makes it so real for me. I can, through your words, really understand it.

But the real beauty is how attuned you are to your daughter and the life you lead together. Breathtaking.

I'm glad right now is a time to breathe rather than be breathless. I hope it continues.

And when you can, share the secret of how you live in the breathing time without waiting, anxiously, for the other shoe to drop. But no pressure...not holding my breath. ;) (Sorry had to get in one more quip with breath. Did not intend a theme. I just get corny that way despite my better judgment.)

NotSoSage said...

Here's hoping for more miracles for you and KayTar and your family.

WarriorMom said...

I hope Kaytar's current bout of health lasts a long, long time!

natalie said...

So, so, so glad all is well with the beautiful KayTar this week.

Can I ask you a question--mom to mom? How do you discipline KayTar when she does something mischiveous (not to get into a debate about spanking)? I'm asking because M is starting to need some (STRONG) discipline about a few things.

Oh, The Joys said...

Thank goodness for a good week, right?!

Kyla said...

Get this:
Josh and I went on a DATE tonight. A real one WITHOUT KIDS. Wow. Best week ever. :)

jen said...

ahhhh...so, so terrific. so glad you are having a good week.

~aj~ said...

Date? What's a date? I seem to remember the term, but it's been sooooo long...